Reasons to Hate 1: The Anaheim (Mighty) Ducks

  1. They won.
    If you can't hate the Stanley Cup champs (and you're not a deluded Ducks fan like Earl Sleek), then there's not much hope for you and you might as well stop reading this series here.

  2. They're going to keep winning.
    They've got a great mix of vets and youth.  Getzlaf, Miller, and Perry are barely old enough to drink in the US, and guys like McDonald, Pahlsson, Kunitz, Moen, Beauchemin, and Pronger still have a lot of life left in them.  Bobby Ryan looks to be the next Corey Perry. Maybe they'll have trouble keeping this team together, and you never know what injuries will do to a team, but for at least the next couple of years, they'll go as far as their goaltending will take them; Giguere's proven himself worthy of the 2003 Conn Smythe win, and Bryzgalov's no slouch either.

  3. They changed their name.
    I'm now sure this was a calculated move to push them over the edge to finally win it all.  See also: the Colobec Nordalanche.

  4. Brian Burke.
    The guy's an arrogant ass.  Worse, he wins.  There's nothing worse than a poor winner.   The Canucks didn't fire him because they were losing (they weren't), they fired him because he's a butthead.  Even if he's arguably been in the fortunate position of taking over teams on the rise, he still has put together the final pieces for a couple of winning teams in a row now.  In Vancouver he orchestrated the Sedins, and if there's a better dynamic duo in the league right now I haven't seen them yet.  In Anaheim he tinkered a bit and then stole Pronger from the Oilers.  Maybe they would have won without CP, but I doubt it.

Chris Pronter hits Tomas Holmstrom 5. The team is as annoying as their GM.
Between the chirpiness of guys like Todd Marchant and Travis Moen, the sheer skill and audacity of guys like Corey Perry and Ryan Getzlaf, the tight checking of Marchant and Samuel Pahlsson, and the “screw you, I'm better than you and I've got a Norris and a Stanley Cup to prove it” of Chris Pronger, this team has got to rank up there amongst the most annoying in the league to play against.  Plus, see reasons 1 and 2.

  1. Teemu Selanne and Scott Niedermayer.
    Selanne's a UFA and won't return unless it's with the Ducks.  Talk about self-selecting for victory.  And Niedermayer's now won about everything there is to win, so he's contemplating retirement?  Sheesh.

I'm sure I could keep going, but this should be enough fuel for the fire.

(Image yanked from, credits Jeff Gross / Getty Images.)